So, um.

Today at my monthly Dr appt I was informed that I have Anti Little C antigens. This could be a potentially high risk development. If worst comes to worst, Hemolytic Disease of the Newborn. Transfusion for the baby at birth. And there is nothing to do for it but wait and monitor my blood. I'm more than a little scared today. I wish the only thing I had to worry about was some flooding (like all of our neighbors). (They all have at least 18 inches of water to deal with. We have 2 puddles. God bless the sump pump.) :P

The power of positive thinking.

Something I totally don't believe in. That's okay though. We got to see our latest bean flickering away on the screen today! One bean, one perfect little heartbeat! March can get here already!!!

Deja Vu

Oh how I loathe the beginning. I feel like a broken record. Like a tired, old, worn out, broken record. I'm not feeling well but that's a good sign... And if one more person tells me to smile because of it I'm gonna puke on them. It's all I've got and it's a lot gross! Praying for a heartbeat on Monday and for the sickness to pass quickly, I've had hyperemesis twice and apparently that "never happens". Please just let it pass soon!!!!

7

Huh. Here we are again. If you're reading this, please keep it to yourself :)

What a difference a year makes.

Warms my heart...

On the Eve of the Fourth of July...

I am wondering if this is what the founding fathers had in mind? State governments shutting down over an inability to balance the budget. States being sued for demanding that people on welfare pass a drug test before receiving their benefits. Bankruptcy. Violence. A recession that just won't quit. I kind of feel like there is no joy left in being an American and that makes me sad. That there is no recovering from where we are. Not without some major changes that will make a lot of people really angry. I'm not sad for myself. I'm sad for my children and their generation. America was once a great nation and could be again but it's them that will suffer. Kind of makes me want to move to Canada. Except I can't stand Moose. Meh.

I've been such a negative nelly these last few days and I am embarrassed to say I've been taking it out on my husband. So incredibly not fair. He works so hard for our family and only complains a... well he complains some... he complains a lot but for very good reasons. I wish I knew what was eating at me so. It's not the stuff I wrote above. That really just pops into my head around the 4th of July. It's something much deeper and I can't even give it a name. How frustrating! I guess I could blame the heat? Or the pressure of being on such a tight budget all the time? Or maybe because I feel cooped up in the house with the kids all day? (Yeah, we play in the backyard with the neighbors a lot but a change of scenery? That would rock.) I would love to be able to take a vacation without anyone to distract me from it. Selfish? Yes. Necessary? I'm starting to think so. When? No. Freaking. Clue.

Husband, if you are reading this, I'm sorry and I love you. Thank you for all you do. Truly.